At the start of the year, i finally resolved to get fit, as i usually do as a new year's resolution, which normally last an indeterminate amount of time from a few hours to a couple of weeks at most, before settling down to a unhealthy life of idleness and sloth.
At the turn of the year, my life was not really any great shakes, i was miserable, fed up, stressed out, depressed about things that had been going off in life which i didn't think i could change, and my self confidence was more or less bumping along at rock bottom. I was overweight, unfit, drinking too much, smoking heavily, not eating good food, and to be honest i wasn't anywhere near my best, and mentally and physically a human train wreck. Not nice to say it, not nice to even have to accept it, and i more than anything there was some sort of acceptance that i had to change things.
Part of that had to come with getting a little bit fitter, not suddenly turn in to a Iron man, living on a athlete's diet, and spending every single waking moment thinking about exercise and living life like a Trappist month, but just doing that little bit that made me a little bit fitter, and with that maybe it could improve my life that little bit more.
January was an interesting month, as New Year's Day was the watershed moment, the day i told myself that i would get up, go for a run, and try and run the excess of nearly a full bottle of Jack Daniel's consumed alone the previous night after work. I got up at 1 in the afternoon, put on a pair of tracksuit bottoms, a hoodie top pulled up, and my pair of Nike Air Rift's as they was the nearest thing i had that resembled running shoes and off i went coughing and spluttering as i tried to run to the bottom of the road, and did a short run that was more or less around the block. I did this again a couple of days later, and just by going 2 or 3 times a week, I'd gone from coughing and gasping my way around the block, to jogging 5k runs, the times were not quick, nor did they have to be, but there was something in it, i began to feel a bit stronger, a bit happier and whilst i was doing this, i was self motivating myself telling myself that you can't change the past but you can change your future.
Runs would then start with loads of good intentions, thinking to myself I'll feel better for a run, before getting out there and being on a run and thinking that i hope nobody see's me, why the bloody hell am i doing this, I'm knackered, i want to stop, i want to go home, it's cold, it's wet, before thinking that I've come this far, not long to go, then nearly home, and crikey, i could do a bit longer at this, and then i would get in, and feel proud of what i had done, have a bit more energy and rest and relax in a nice long hot bath, and feel that little bit better about myself for doing it.
My running has been steady and consistent, I've been getting out there a couple of times a week, not really worrying about how quick I've been going, or being overly concerned about progress or a lack of progress, but just doing what i can do within my limits, and enjoying the benefits of it. What did happen was that i felt like i enjoyed it enough, and enjoyed the benefits a lot more to make a commitment to carrying on for a few more months, and i made that commitment by entering a 10k and deciding to benefit a very worthy cause by doing it for charity. In my case the Sheffield Children's Hospital as i have a couple of close friends who came close to losing their baby son a couple of years back, and i saw at close quarters the superb work they do, and besides i spent enough time in there as a child through various escapades that it was time to give them a little bit back.
I've been a runner now for 5 and a half months, it's not that long, but it is long enough for me to know that it is now something that i don't just do, because i feel that i should do, or feel under pressure from myself to do it, it is more something that i want to do deep down. I get up earlier just so i can go out there and get a run in at the start of my day, or when i get back from work, i do a quick change and get out there and have a run, because it is something that i actually want to do, and look forwards to doing. The hardest thing now is to stop myself from doing too much and injuring myself, as if i could, i would go out there every day such is the enjoyment that i get out of it.
Recently i felt the need to push myself to the next level, and after chatting to a couple of people who i work with who also run, i decided to give myself perhaps the biggest test so far, and that was to up my runs from my usual 5k and the occasional 7k, to trying to do 10k. I got up early in the morning to give myself enough time to do it, and have plenty of rest time afterwards, and the night before i planned out the route i would take, and i was really looking forwards to the challenge. It was a big success, as i really paced myself during the early section of my run, which meant there was enough in the tank for a long 2k hill climb, and after the 2k hill climb i had already passed the 6k mark, and then afterwards after breaking the hill climb i felt my body click in to another gear, where the running was more and relaxing, effortless and for the first time i felt like i was in the zone. I ended up doing just under 11k in an hour and 30 minutes. The time irrelevant, but the distance massively important.
I'm thinking about a lot of other things that have stemmed from the running, I've not smoked for almost 4 weeks with one relapse in between (which i felt deeply ashamed about), limited my alcohol intake drastically, and tried to reduce the amount of crap food that i eat, and replace it with healthy food. Salad's instead of chips, and try and avoid Kebab's as much as possible. It's not been any conscious attempt to diet, but i just feel that i don't really have the urge to drink alcohol for the sake of it at the moment, and i don't feel the need to snack, or to eat crap comfort food.
The biggest thing for me, and this is going back to the start of this blog, is that the problems and issues that i faced in my life before the start of my running seem a lot less severe than they did, and the fitness has given me a lot more energy, the psychological effect has made me a lot more relaxed and chilled out, and you know what i feel absolutely great for doing it. I've lost weight, and the most important thing for me, without sound arrogant and aloof is that my self-confidence and self-perception has improved beyond belief.
I've well and truly got the running bug, and it is great.
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